Jonathan: You have a resistance to alcohol which is rarely seen on our continent.
Author: thedailymails
Two friends, on gifts.
Cecily: It’s so easy to find gifts for women… A small bracelet, a petite pair of earrings, a little bunch of flowers…
Carlo: A medium-sized bank account…
Cecily, on body and lobster issues.
Cecily: Raj just called me fat. I only ate one single lobster…
Alexander, on stock characters.
Alexander: I have realised recently that the vast majority of people one meets are simply stock characters in the grand scheme of life’s narrative. The only people worth holding on to are other “writers”. Nearly all of the people with whom I consort are plot devices, nothing more. So now I’m bingeing on Häagen-Dazs, drinking The Botanist out of the bottle, and watching Bridget Jones’ Diary.
Alexander, on himself.
Alexander: I am watching Annie Hall and just realised the book on which I rolled a joint is Still Life with Woodpecker. I have fallen so deeply into my own stereotype that it’s no longer funny.
Cecily, a note to a traveling lover.
Cecily: My darling, wrapped in white robes and white sheets and colourful dreams, I am one day closer to seeing you again.
Cecily, on herself.
Cecily: Horizontal mobility would suit me just as well as upward mobility in this life. I have already reached a level of refinement and class unrivalled, and now I seek to enrich my experience, broadly and without apology.
Two friends, on world domination.
Arnaud: The world is mine!
Cecily: I want Paris.
Arnaud: No.
Cecily: In that case, I’ll have to seize it by force or charm. I have all of the men of Paris on my side. What do you have? The female waitstaff of your favourite café?
Two friends, waiting by the phone.
Cecily: You offended the hell out of her. Why do you think she is going to call you back?
Maurice: Because I believe in miracles.
Two friends, on Paris.
Alexander: What I need is to return to Paris and find a husband.
Cecily: Paris is Paris. Even if you don’t find love, it’s the best place on earth to experience loneliness.
thedailymails 