Cecily: I will never record my voice because I sound like a muppet.
Ishmael: Is this secretly because you are actually a muppet?
comedian
Raj, on doctors.
Raj: Doctors are just tech support for the human machine.
Two friends, on a spider.
Arnaud: I have the biggest of the big spiders in my hotel room. It’s 10cm in diametre…
Cecily: Did you measure him? Maybe you can catch him in a jar and pin him behind a picture frame like a scientifically mounted butterfly.
Arnaud: I just called the hotel staff. The spider is now a crêpe.
Two friends, on millinery.
Cecily: Have you seen my new hat?
Jonathan: It’s a bird! It’s a bird!
Cecily, on immorality.
Cecily: There is nothing more immoral than putting a bunny in a dryer.
Pedro, on Cecily’s needs.
Pedro: A queen like you has much more use for a dragon than a boyfriend.
Pedro, on Cecily’s potential husband.
Pedro: It would not be fair for you to have a husband. Think about all the others left without a muse for their poor souls.
Carlo, on love.
Carlo: Remember, if you think you are in love Cecily, a butterfly cannot suddenly turn into a snail.
Two friends, on the virtues of wine.
Cecily: Jesus converted water into wine!
Arnaud: And did he drink it?
Two friends, on waving.
Cecily: I know exactly how to wave like the Queen!
Raj: Queen Elizabeth II is not a Vulcan.
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