Cecily: I may be in love. I need your advice.

Delilah: Well, there are about six million romantic comedies you could consult that have more knowledge on the subject than I.

Cecily: Can you suggest one?

Delilah: That’s not really my scene. From my understanding of the genre, romantic comedies generally build up to a truth-telling climax wherein the man’s dreams are torn in twain, or a comical farce in which the man turns out to be gay. Or a neo-nazi.

Cecily: You’re thinking of opera. Or Broadway.

Delilah: The point is, it’s not your job to be psychologically tortured by love feelings. The story will be a hit at the box office either way.