Cecily: I must find someone to marry.
Jacques: This is not necessary. You do not have to write your marital status on your business card.
love
A mentor and a student, on whoredom.
Cecily: Under your mentorship I have flourished into a bit of a right whore.
Christian: Beware. Whoredom too spirals into its own squealing mundanity.
Two sisters, on the box office.
Cecily: I may be in love. I need your advice.
Delilah: Well, there are about six million romantic comedies you could consult that have more knowledge on the subject than I.
Cecily: Can you suggest one?
Delilah: That’s not really my scene. From my understanding of the genre, romantic comedies generally build up to a truth-telling climax wherein the man’s dreams are torn in twain, or a comical farce in which the man turns out to be gay. Or a neo-nazi.
Cecily: You’re thinking of opera. Or Broadway.
Delilah: The point is, it’s not your job to be psychologically tortured by love feelings. The story will be a hit at the box office either way.
Two friends, on lamb.
Cecily: I spent the whole of yesterday stressed about the small levels of dust in my house, and obsessing over the lamb shanks that I’m cooking for my impending romantic home date.
Alexander: I am silently judging you for eating not only an animal, but a baby animal.
Cecily: I love eating baby animals. And wearing their parents.
Two friends, flirting with identity.
Cecily: Can I be Rahoul?
Rahoul: You cannot be Rahoul, but you can be on top of him, just once.
Alexander, on modes of being.
Alexander: I have only two settings: monogamy and unrequited longing.
Arnaud, on not asking.
Cecily: I am in bed, listening to my lover play Flamenco guitar, and the light is streaming through a glorious open window. I want somebody to bring me a croissant.
Arnaud: You are in a bad position, meine Führerin. A real and charismatic leader has everything she desires without asking.
From one friend to another. Advice.
Carlo: Try to do some administration. Do not be too full of sentiment. You are like a rich man who does not know what to do with his money.
Cecily: But I am not rich!
Carlo: You are rich. You have two men in love with you.
Charles answers Cecily’s questions.
Charles: A lot of men are just very wary of sirens (in the mythological sense). Sirens are extremely exciting for about two weeks, but emotionally draining thereafter.
Two friends, on love á la carte.
Alexander: Would that we all could have love delivered to us via Alloresto.
Cecily: As a side to sushi. Without la douleur exquise.
thedailymails 